a wish

Today, I wish for you an ordinary day of miracles...
An unexpected phone call from an old friend,
Green traffic lights on your way to work,
A good sing-along on the radio,
Your keys right where you left them.
I wish for you a day of happiness and perfection...
Little bite-size pieces of perfection that give you the funny feeling
that SOMEONE is smiling on you,
and holding you so gently because
you are someone special and rare.
I wish you a day of Peace, Happiness and Joy.

things I will probably never understand

I will never understand the doctor's at mike's hospital
i will probably never understand why mike feels the need to cut
i will probably not understand the dark side of depression
i will never fully understand that there is going to be sunshine on the other side of this pain


i will not really get the culture of the indian tribes around us and their sense of entitlement
i won't fully understand why people use drugs like meth and cocaine
i won't understand why some couples have 5 kids and some none


i will probably not come close to understanding why people are mean and uncaring
or why people are just not helpful when there is a need.

i will somehow continue to learn and grow and seek... I will hold tight to Jesus and those around me.....

just saying hi

i hope you all had a great Christmas
ours was quiet and nice
thanks to Jean for letting us be part of your family
thanks to James and Jean for hanging with me the day after
thanks to Savan for sticking with me
its so quiet without mike and jake but we are making it!

attn: girl who called, not nice to no show

i still have shopping to do.
yes I work, yes I have store
and yes I went to 3 open houses this weekend
when I should have been shopping
tonight I knew we wouldn't be busy with all the snow
so I thought I would leave at 6:30
6:15, unknown caller rings.. "can I come work on a project"
"SURE!" I reply (stupid me, stupid me)
7:01 no customer. grrrrrrr
I should have been shopping and be home at a decent hour
cest le vie... its just time, right?

Amazing

I have officially met the GREATEST photographer on earth. She knew our style she is incredibly affordable and just a JOY to be around. Savannah says that Michelle is her new BFF........If you are looking for someone who is caring, professional and talented, I know just the girl. Email me or drop me a comment

Beauty from Pain

This is a song by Superchick....and it was on a mix cd... it really spoke to me this week. I need a reminder that this journey though painful and way too long will be worth it in the end.

The lights go out all around me
One last candle to keep out the night
And then the darkness surrounds me
I know I'm alive
But I feel like I've died
And all that's left is to accept that it's over
My dreams ran like sand through the fists that I made
I try to keep warm but I just grow colder
I feel like I'm slipping away
After all this has passed
I still will remain
After I've cried my last
There'll be beauty from pain
Though it won't be today
Someday I'll hope again
And there'll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain
My whole world is the pain inside me
The best I can do is just get through the day
When life before is only a memory
I wonder why God let me walk through this place
And though I can't understand why this happened
I know that I will when I look back someday
And see how You've brought beauty from ashes
And made me as gold purified through these flames
Here and I am at the end of me (at the end of me)
Trying to hold to what I can't see
I forgot how to hope
This night's been so long
I cling to your promise there will be a dawn

thoughts from the dark side

this is know
people who don't return phone calls are not nice and piss me off
people who blow other people off are not nice
people who say mean things and make me cry are horribe awful beings
everytime my mom goes out of town i cry
i need new boots so i can kick mean people
i got a diet coke today on my desk from my secret sister, she rocks
savannah has to get her drivers license or i am going to make her go away
i hate housesitting for my folks almost as much as mean people
i love my store and the angels who help me there
i hate crying at my desk
i am sick of having a sick husband
i am done with being nice, I might swear more too
i am sure that God doesn't care about this drama as much as I do
and I am sick of talking about it
i just want a new life, a vacation and some new fun clothes....
man I sound pretty awful